Tourette's Summer Tournament of MegaEvil - The Prize

The winner of the Summer Tournament of Evil will receive Tourette's Official American Blitzkrieg Survival Kit. The kit will be shipped to the winner, and the winner will happily accept all of it. There are no negotiations or replacements. The prize is roughly as shown (see full sized photo). If something is missing because Mr. Tourette drinks it or misuses it, the winner will have to be satisfied with what they get. If the winner is impregnated during use of the prize, Zygote Publishing and Mr. Tourette are in no way responsible for the offspring, unless it can be genetically proven to be sired by Mr. Tourette.

The prize includes:

1 Vintage gasmask
1 bottle of Jack Daniel's Tennessee WHISKEY
1 copy, the Holy Bible
1 jar Vaseline
1 pair reinforced latex gloves
12 Durex 'Love' brand condoms
1 tube KY Jelly
1 copy, Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana
1 issue, Hustler Magazine
1 roll Duct tape
1 vintage issue of Heavy Metal Magazine, 1984 Crossroads Special
1 issue, Soldier of Fortune
1 copy, Jean-Paul Sartre's Being and Nothingness
1 copy, Albert Camus' The Plague
64 Crayola crayons with built in sharpener
50 tablets Aspirin
1 used toothbrush
1 12 inch double pronged Doc Johnson dildo, nick-named Il Duce. Like new.
1 copy, Francis Ford Coppola's Apocalypse Now
1 bronze Marriage Blessing plaque, with crucifix
1 album, Johnny Cash's Greatest Hits
1 album, John Lee Hooker's Greatest Hits
1 copy, Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment
1 American flag
1 book of matches
1 red notebook
1 red pen

Return to Contest Page | Full sized photo of the prize